...when your significant other comes to you with a fear that they have about the relationship, however silly it may seem to you, the correct response IS NOT to turn the whole thing around and blame it on them. The correct way to deal with it is to talk to your partner and quell the fears if they're unfounded and to tell them the truth if they're not. It is not, I repeat NOT an option to make them feel even shittier than they already do and to act like you would rather die than talk to this person right now. It isn't ok to let someone that you love continue to feel badly about themselves because you don't want to be inconvenienced with it at the moment.
In other news I had a dream last night that Huck told me she didn't want to be my friend anymore...
All in all, it hasn't been the best day yet. Huck, if you're out there, you still love me, right?
Sunday, February 26, 2006
Friday, February 24, 2006
A downward spiral
Bon Jovi has a new single out that sounds like any other country single out there. Wait!!! Bon Jovi isn't about country!! They're about rocking tunes and living dangerously!!
It's about being Wanted, Dead or Alive goddammit!
Sigh...
It's about being Wanted, Dead or Alive goddammit!
Sigh...
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
Eww.
I just received a myspace.com friend request from a girl who has 134441 friends. One hundred thirty four thousand four hundred and fourty one "friends".
I don't think that in my entire life I've even met that number of people. That's significantly more than the number of people in the town I live in.
That's roughly a quarter of the population of the ENTIRE STATE of Wyoming.
I kinda feel lke the last guy in line at the Houston 500...
I don't think that in my entire life I've even met that number of people. That's significantly more than the number of people in the town I live in.
That's roughly a quarter of the population of the ENTIRE STATE of Wyoming.
I kinda feel lke the last guy in line at the Houston 500...
Sunday, February 19, 2006
Is it bad that I just dripped ice cream on my computer?
I was eating a delicious ice cream sandwich and Bloop! A small dollop of creamy goodness fell onto the mouse. P would greatly disapprove. He was very strict about not having any food near the computer. But it's Sunday evening and I wanted to tool around the internet and eat an ice cream sandwich, damnit! I'm an adult, even if I can't eat something without making a mess.
In other news, our scene shop caught fire yesterday. This is a pretty epic disaster. For anyone out there who may not be of the theatrical persuasion, a Scene Shop is where sets are built and kept until being transported to the theatre. Needless to say for a scene shop to catch fire is a fairly disastrous occurence. Thankfully, most of the set for Second Samuel was in the truck when the fire started and the office where all the plans are was apparently left unscathed. From what I've heard, however, most of the tools are trashed due to water damage and the structure itself is wrecked. Now, I have been responsible for some snafu's here and there but never, no NEVER, have I been at fault for such a tragic incident. That's right folks! This happened because someone fucked up royally. Someone is responsible for lighting the scene shop ON FIRE!!!!! Not on purpose, of course, but still...How shitty would you feel?!?! Can you imagine having to give that phone call to our boss?!?!
YOU: "Hey, sir! How's New York?
HIM: "It's fucking New York. Why are you calling me?"
YOU: "Well...sir...it's, umm, see the thing is..."
HIM: " What the fuck are you trying to say? Quit wasting my time!"
YOU: "Umm, ok...The scene shop is on fire, bye!"
Click.
No amount of money could have persuaded me to make that phone call. No siree.
On a complete and total tangent, I've decided to do some revamping of myself which, among other things, includes giving my smile some much needed dazzle. I have a dentist appointment tomorrow which will be the first one in about, oh, six years. Guess I should bust out the floss, huh?
In other news, our scene shop caught fire yesterday. This is a pretty epic disaster. For anyone out there who may not be of the theatrical persuasion, a Scene Shop is where sets are built and kept until being transported to the theatre. Needless to say for a scene shop to catch fire is a fairly disastrous occurence. Thankfully, most of the set for Second Samuel was in the truck when the fire started and the office where all the plans are was apparently left unscathed. From what I've heard, however, most of the tools are trashed due to water damage and the structure itself is wrecked. Now, I have been responsible for some snafu's here and there but never, no NEVER, have I been at fault for such a tragic incident. That's right folks! This happened because someone fucked up royally. Someone is responsible for lighting the scene shop ON FIRE!!!!! Not on purpose, of course, but still...How shitty would you feel?!?! Can you imagine having to give that phone call to our boss?!?!
YOU: "Hey, sir! How's New York?
HIM: "It's fucking New York. Why are you calling me?"
YOU: "Well...sir...it's, umm, see the thing is..."
HIM: " What the fuck are you trying to say? Quit wasting my time!"
YOU: "Umm, ok...The scene shop is on fire, bye!"
Click.
No amount of money could have persuaded me to make that phone call. No siree.
On a complete and total tangent, I've decided to do some revamping of myself which, among other things, includes giving my smile some much needed dazzle. I have a dentist appointment tomorrow which will be the first one in about, oh, six years. Guess I should bust out the floss, huh?
Thursday, February 16, 2006
You @#&%*%#$ piece of mother$@#* #!$@!!!!
As you folks may or may not be able to tell from the title of this post, I'm a little peeved right now. I finally have all the Disney World pictures and I was all ready to load them up so that I could share the fabulousity of Bear and I with all of you. Well, this piece of %@#$ site is refusing to cooperate. Technology stinks!
In other news I was "surfing" the "web" and I found a highly disturbing picture of the Olsen Twins, wearing nothing but hotpants and pasties. I'm aware that there are clever folks who use their mom and pop's computers to doctor pictures of celebrities but this one looks pretty darn real. I would post it so that you all could look at it but...ya know. (See above.) Also, I'm a little weary of posting jack off material on this thing.
Maybe it's a bit naive of me to think so, but it always seemed like the Olsen gals had fairly decent heads on their slender shoulders. Sure there's that whole eating disorder thing but really, who cares? Who hasn't had an eating disorder these days? It just seems that these are antics that I would expect from Paris Hilton and Lyndsey Lohan. Scantily clad drunken debauchery doesn't seem up the alley of these two. That coupled with the fact that there is a slightly lesbianic/incestual innuendo about the whole thing just ups the creep and ick factor. Strange as it may sound, I'm a little disappointed.
Come on girls. What would Bob, Dave and John say?
*Addendum: I showed the picture to bear and he concluded that it was, indeed, a fake. I, of course, felt foolish.
In other news I was "surfing" the "web" and I found a highly disturbing picture of the Olsen Twins, wearing nothing but hotpants and pasties. I'm aware that there are clever folks who use their mom and pop's computers to doctor pictures of celebrities but this one looks pretty darn real. I would post it so that you all could look at it but...ya know. (See above.) Also, I'm a little weary of posting jack off material on this thing.
Maybe it's a bit naive of me to think so, but it always seemed like the Olsen gals had fairly decent heads on their slender shoulders. Sure there's that whole eating disorder thing but really, who cares? Who hasn't had an eating disorder these days? It just seems that these are antics that I would expect from Paris Hilton and Lyndsey Lohan. Scantily clad drunken debauchery doesn't seem up the alley of these two. That coupled with the fact that there is a slightly lesbianic/incestual innuendo about the whole thing just ups the creep and ick factor. Strange as it may sound, I'm a little disappointed.
Come on girls. What would Bob, Dave and John say?
*Addendum: I showed the picture to bear and he concluded that it was, indeed, a fake. I, of course, felt foolish.
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
It just scared me so bad!
If
y o u
l i k e
s o m e o n e
r i g h t
n o w
a n d
j u s t
w a n n a
s t r a i g h t
u p
c h i l l
h u g
k i s s
t a k e
a
n a p
w a t c h
a
m o v i e
a n d
c u d d l e
w i t h
a n d
c a n ' t
g e t
h i m / h e r
o u t
o f
y o u r
h e a d
t h e n
r e - p o s t
t h i s
t i t l e d
" I l i k e h i m / h e r "
w i t h i n
1 m i n u t e
a n d
w h o e v e r
y o u
a r e
w a n t i n g
w i l l
s u r p r i s e
y o u
t o m o r r o w
If you dont repost this in 4 minutes you will have bad relationship problems for the next 4 years
I have many friends who pass on this type of email and whatnot to me and others and I usually just blow them off but this one made a pretty hefty threat so I thought I better deliver. Four years of bad relationship problems?!?! That sucks!!!!! Why can't these things just do something good for those people who do them? Why does it have to affect the people who choose not to?! I feel like I've unwillingly and unknowingly gotten myself into some type of "Ringu" like circumstances. I'm scared that if I don't post this effing thing that someone will find me in my closet, all shriveled and terrified looking. ARGGGHHHHH!!!!!
y o u
l i k e
s o m e o n e
r i g h t
n o w
a n d
j u s t
w a n n a
s t r a i g h t
u p
c h i l l
h u g
k i s s
t a k e
a
n a p
w a t c h
a
m o v i e
a n d
c u d d l e
w i t h
a n d
c a n ' t
g e t
h i m / h e r
o u t
o f
y o u r
h e a d
t h e n
r e - p o s t
t h i s
t i t l e d
" I l i k e h i m / h e r "
w i t h i n
1 m i n u t e
a n d
w h o e v e r
y o u
a r e
w a n t i n g
w i l l
s u r p r i s e
y o u
t o m o r r o w
If you dont repost this in 4 minutes you will have bad relationship problems for the next 4 years
I have many friends who pass on this type of email and whatnot to me and others and I usually just blow them off but this one made a pretty hefty threat so I thought I better deliver. Four years of bad relationship problems?!?! That sucks!!!!! Why can't these things just do something good for those people who do them? Why does it have to affect the people who choose not to?! I feel like I've unwillingly and unknowingly gotten myself into some type of "Ringu" like circumstances. I'm scared that if I don't post this effing thing that someone will find me in my closet, all shriveled and terrified looking. ARGGGHHHHH!!!!!
Monday, February 13, 2006
I don't feel pretty. I don't feel witty. I don't feel fine.
I feel like I'm the last kid to get picked for the kickball team...again. I don't like feeling like I'm not enough and yet, I feel like that now. I feel unattractive, boring, and useless.
I'm sure it's just a bout of the blues, probably excerbated by the weather. It's a widely known fact that I'm not a huge fan of this area during the winter. But still, I feel like just about the most unappealing creature on the planet right now...
Yuck.
I feel like I'm the last kid to get picked for the kickball team...again. I don't like feeling like I'm not enough and yet, I feel like that now. I feel unattractive, boring, and useless.
I'm sure it's just a bout of the blues, probably excerbated by the weather. It's a widely known fact that I'm not a huge fan of this area during the winter. But still, I feel like just about the most unappealing creature on the planet right now...
Yuck.
Thursday, February 09, 2006
They say it's your birthday
Today is my birthday.
About three or four years ago, birthdays really started losing their magic for me. No more extravagant celebrations, no more raging parties. More and more the day was losing it's importance, not only to myself but to those around me. Last year I can safely say was the worst birthday I have ever had. I spent most of it on the phone with People in TX crying my seyes out about how no one cared. It's never good to cry on your birthday. It's like crying in Disney World. Yes, we went out and yes it was fun but I kinda feel like four hours of drunken good times does not make up for 20 hours of feeling like crap.
But I digress. Today is the day I was born and while it may not be a matter of national importance, while no one here in VA may even kno... I know. And Bear knows and baby girl and princess and T and K and Huck and my family. I no longer need the balloons and the cake or the alcohol and the hangover...maybe a couple of phone calls and a few brilliant gifts will suffice. Maybe just knowing that at least a handful of people feel that today is special because it brought me ionto the world...maybe that's what birthdays are about.
About three or four years ago, birthdays really started losing their magic for me. No more extravagant celebrations, no more raging parties. More and more the day was losing it's importance, not only to myself but to those around me. Last year I can safely say was the worst birthday I have ever had. I spent most of it on the phone with People in TX crying my seyes out about how no one cared. It's never good to cry on your birthday. It's like crying in Disney World. Yes, we went out and yes it was fun but I kinda feel like four hours of drunken good times does not make up for 20 hours of feeling like crap.
But I digress. Today is the day I was born and while it may not be a matter of national importance, while no one here in VA may even kno... I know. And Bear knows and baby girl and princess and T and K and Huck and my family. I no longer need the balloons and the cake or the alcohol and the hangover...maybe a couple of phone calls and a few brilliant gifts will suffice. Maybe just knowing that at least a handful of people feel that today is special because it brought me ionto the world...maybe that's what birthdays are about.
Monday, February 06, 2006
Bad, insecure, whimpering habits
We, as humans, are creatures of habit. We become conditioned to have certain responses to certain stimuli. Therefore when in a relationship, whether it be platonic, familial, or romantic, and someone's behavior shifts, it's noticed. The shift can be small, virtually imperceptible but it still registers. There is an episode of S&TC where Carrie says of Mr. Big "The change was small, imperceptible to anyone but me..." That's true. We notice the smallest changes in our partners. They don't feel small to us though. They feel huge. It's the survival tactic that allows us to decipher the tone of the "Hello" on the other end of the line, the mood in the hug, the anything in the everything. It's what signals the fight or flight response in all of us. And because we are also innately insecure creatures, we immediately believe these little shifts to be the red flags of something much more dark and sinister because what would cause your loved one to so suddenly do a 180? Infidelity? Boredom? Sudden loss of interest? Anger? And because humans are also notoriously self centered beings, we inevitably draw the conclusion that the shift is directly related to us.
But it's hard not to think that, no? We (or should I take responsibility here and say "I"?) like to think that those that we love are as affected by us as we are by them. That funk has to be about them not loving us anymore. It couldn't possibly be any one of the billion other things that any given person is dealing with on any given day. When I was little, I used to ask my friends at least once a day if they were mad at me. If one of them was in a bad mood, I immediately drew the conclusion that the mood was directed at me and I spent the day wondering what I had done to irk them so bad. Once upon a time, someone and I got into a fight and this person went home and tried to hookup with his roommate. I can't believe that that was done out of anything but spite. So the habit was created that anytime we got into a fight after that I wound up apologizing for things I didn't even do out of fear that he would leave and that I would have to go through that pain and humiliation again.
I also know that when I have a shift, it's never without reason. I'm angry or bored or I don't love you anymore or I'm hurt or jealous or whatever. I don't ever wake up and just alter the way I am with someone for no reason. So, obviously, when I feel that shift from someone else, I know that it's bullshit to say that nothing is wrong. We're not stupid here, folks!
So I guess, the bottom line is... tell me what's wrong because the reality is probably much less worse that what my hyper-sensitive/insecure mind will be thinking....
Food for thought.
But it's hard not to think that, no? We (or should I take responsibility here and say "I"?) like to think that those that we love are as affected by us as we are by them. That funk has to be about them not loving us anymore. It couldn't possibly be any one of the billion other things that any given person is dealing with on any given day. When I was little, I used to ask my friends at least once a day if they were mad at me. If one of them was in a bad mood, I immediately drew the conclusion that the mood was directed at me and I spent the day wondering what I had done to irk them so bad. Once upon a time, someone and I got into a fight and this person went home and tried to hookup with his roommate. I can't believe that that was done out of anything but spite. So the habit was created that anytime we got into a fight after that I wound up apologizing for things I didn't even do out of fear that he would leave and that I would have to go through that pain and humiliation again.
I also know that when I have a shift, it's never without reason. I'm angry or bored or I don't love you anymore or I'm hurt or jealous or whatever. I don't ever wake up and just alter the way I am with someone for no reason. So, obviously, when I feel that shift from someone else, I know that it's bullshit to say that nothing is wrong. We're not stupid here, folks!
So I guess, the bottom line is... tell me what's wrong because the reality is probably much less worse that what my hyper-sensitive/insecure mind will be thinking....
Food for thought.
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